happy anniversary
Happy 1 month-since-my-last-post-Anniversary all!
Let's see. I took two weeks "vacation" to write my term paper for class. 12 out of the 14 days were spend reading and writing till my eyes were very nearly diluted from excessive water consumption due to excessive sweatingdue to excessive heat. Day 13 was spent at the beach getting crispy; day 14 spentin bed trying not to let my skin rub against the sheets and being depressed about going back to work.
Now back to a regular working schedule and no classes for a week and a half or so, I am ready to rip those sweaty eyes of mine out. It took being on break from class to remind me how dreadful it is to distract yourself from work without purposeful, meaningful activity. Of course, I could be doing all kinds of meaningful, purposeful things even though I am in academic intermission. But doing those productivethings during billable hours doesn't have the aura of higher justified purpose. Reading an article for class looks noble, while reading an article just for the hell of it looks like you don't have enough work to do and are slacking.
Which, funny I mention it, happens to be the case. I was "transferred" from Dr. Veruca Salt's domain into a new project which hasn't really begun yet. The lack of work to do really got bad because today I actually asked for more work to do. I couldn't take, not just the boredom, but the guilt of feeling totally useless. And truth be told, I don't know what is up with that. We are always crazy in the lab. In my 3.5 years there it has been pretty bustling, and hectic and stressful about 80% ofthe time. Lately though, not much happening. Not much pressure. Not much running around. To top it off, there is an extremely bad collective attitude problem. Bad, bad feelings and snappy emails all over the place. It all makes unemployment and destitution look that much more attractive.
And speaking of destitution, we as of yesterday have our gas back on. I can't say that I'm happy about it: we are out $707.23 and now have to think twice about using the dishwasher. I got used to doing dishes in cold water, cooking on a hot plate, and the cold water showers expedited the tediousness of getting ready in the morning. Not only did we have to shell out more than $700, but we also have to pay the other half of our (massive) past due balance when we get our next bill. It's the damn commercial account. They think that becuase we are technically a "business" that we make money. The outrage!
But it's not all miserable: I have been trying to teach myself to sing in the car on my way to work. It's sad, becauseI really try to make sounds that sound like music and not catatonic moaning, but I suspect that I sound more sick and drunk than I sound like Elanor Friedberger. Ok, so it's a little miserable, but not for me. Only for the unlucky who get stuck next to me at stoplights.
Let's see. I took two weeks "vacation" to write my term paper for class. 12 out of the 14 days were spend reading and writing till my eyes were very nearly diluted from excessive water consumption due to excessive sweatingdue to excessive heat. Day 13 was spent at the beach getting crispy; day 14 spentin bed trying not to let my skin rub against the sheets and being depressed about going back to work.
Now back to a regular working schedule and no classes for a week and a half or so, I am ready to rip those sweaty eyes of mine out. It took being on break from class to remind me how dreadful it is to distract yourself from work without purposeful, meaningful activity. Of course, I could be doing all kinds of meaningful, purposeful things even though I am in academic intermission. But doing those productivethings during billable hours doesn't have the aura of higher justified purpose. Reading an article for class looks noble, while reading an article just for the hell of it looks like you don't have enough work to do and are slacking.
Which, funny I mention it, happens to be the case. I was "transferred" from Dr. Veruca Salt's domain into a new project which hasn't really begun yet. The lack of work to do really got bad because today I actually asked for more work to do. I couldn't take, not just the boredom, but the guilt of feeling totally useless. And truth be told, I don't know what is up with that. We are always crazy in the lab. In my 3.5 years there it has been pretty bustling, and hectic and stressful about 80% ofthe time. Lately though, not much happening. Not much pressure. Not much running around. To top it off, there is an extremely bad collective attitude problem. Bad, bad feelings and snappy emails all over the place. It all makes unemployment and destitution look that much more attractive.
And speaking of destitution, we as of yesterday have our gas back on. I can't say that I'm happy about it: we are out $707.23 and now have to think twice about using the dishwasher. I got used to doing dishes in cold water, cooking on a hot plate, and the cold water showers expedited the tediousness of getting ready in the morning. Not only did we have to shell out more than $700, but we also have to pay the other half of our (massive) past due balance when we get our next bill. It's the damn commercial account. They think that becuase we are technically a "business" that we make money. The outrage!
But it's not all miserable: I have been trying to teach myself to sing in the car on my way to work. It's sad, becauseI really try to make sounds that sound like music and not catatonic moaning, but I suspect that I sound more sick and drunk than I sound like Elanor Friedberger. Ok, so it's a little miserable, but not for me. Only for the unlucky who get stuck next to me at stoplights.
posted by beef at 9:17 PM
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